Authentically Nita

I'm 44, and while I'm no expert, I believe women in their 40's should have a different outlook on dating than those in their younger years. As we age, our priorities change. We reach a point where we no longer have time for "projects." And that includes men who don't have their shit together. At this age a man should be stable, both financially and emotionally. We've invested time and energy building ourselves up and we deserve a partner who has done the same.  Once you reach a certain age, you can no longer afford to invest your time and energy into someone who isn't on the same page as you.  You've spent years working on yourself and improving your life. You've invested time and money into your education, career, and personal growth. You've learned the importance of taking care of your physical and mental health. So why should you settle for a man who hasn't done the same? A man who has done the work is someone who is emotionally matu...

A lot of women fall into the trap of settling for men who are not growing emotionally or mentally. So, today let's explore the importance of investing in a partner who invests in themselves. We will look at the five warning signs that a man is not growing.  Unwilling to be accountable -  A man who is not willing to take responsibility for his actions or mistakes is not growing. He may blame others for his problems, make excuses, or refuse to admit when he's wrong. This lack of accountability can cause major problems in a relationship, leading to mistrust, resentment, and emotional distance.  Unaware of his faults -  A man who doesn't recognize his faults and limitations is not growing. He may have a fixed mindset, believing that he is who he is and can't change. (You know, those, "I'm set in my ways" guys). This can be frustrating for a partner who wants to grow and evolve together.  Dependent on you for every little thing -  A man who is dependent on you ...

Let's talk about weak men. We've all come across them. The ones who blame others for their shortcomings. The ones that struggle with accountability and reject anything that challenges them to be better. In essence - the narcissistic and self-centered ones. It is not easy to deal with these men, especially when you find yourself romantically involved with them. Weak men often have fragile egos, and anything that threatens their little fragile sense of self is perceived as a threat. We have to understand that these men are not secure within themselves, and they rely on external validation to feel good about themselves. Therefore, when you try to challenge them to be better, they feel like you are attacking them, and they become defensive. They cannot handle criticism, and they struggle with personal growth. One of the reasons why weak men struggle with personal growth is that they are afraid of change. They are comfortable in their current ways, and they are not willing to step o...

Ladies, it's time to stop dating needy men. You know the ones I'm talking about, the guys who seem to only take from the relationship and never give back. The ones who drain your energy, demand your attention and always need you to do something for them. If you're tired of being the Goodwill of your relationships and donating your vagina to men who don't deserve it, then this post is for you. First, let me clarify what I mean by “needy men.” These are men who are incapable of doing anything for themselves and believe that the world owes them something. They are the ones who always need you to babysit them emotionally or financially. When you’re dating a needy man, you are the one doing all the heavy lifting in the relationship. You're paying for the majority of expenses, driving them around, and picking up their messes.  Let me emphasize the importance of reciprocity in relationships. Relationships should be about give and take. When you're doing everything for ...

The hunt for the perfect man is never-ending. We want the total package – good looks, humor, wealth, great sex, and intelligence. However, statistics show that many men are not what they seem on the outside. Many of them are just little boys in a grown man's body. Immaturity comes in all shapes and sizes. Trouble happens when we assume that the exterior of a man represents the interior character. So let's talk about how to spot a real man and what qualities make them different from little boys. Photo by KoolShooters   Real men prioritize their mental health and well-being. Mental Health is often a topic that is rarely discussed in men, and some even consider it taboo. However, it is one of the greatest signs that a man is a real man. Real men prioritize their mental health by attending therapy sessions, taking breaks when overwhelmed and participate in activities that promote relaxation and self-care. They are not afraid to admit when things are becoming too much for them, and ...

Breaking up with someone is hard, especially if you had a strong connection with them. While it's important to move on after a breakup, some people don't seem to get the memo. They try to stay in touch with their exes, even though the relationship is over. But the question is, why do they do it? And more importantly, why shouldn't you entertain their efforts? It's a Delaying Tactic: Men who try to stay in touch with their exes are simply delaying the inevitable. They don't want to let go completely, so they keep themselves in the picture, hoping that their exes will eventually change their minds. This tactic can delay the healing process for both parties involved, and it's not fair to either of them. The sooner you cut ties with your ex, the faster you can move on with your life. It Shows a Lack of Respect: Men who try to stay in touch with their exes don't always realize that they are not showing respect for their former partner's decision to end the r...

Ladies, we have all been there, we have all invested into a man who couldn't appreciate us. Time is a precious commodity that never stops ticking away. It doesn't matter if you're rich, poor, young, or old, time waits for no man. As women, we often find ourselves wasting our valuable time on men who do not deserve it. Those men who are not willing to put in the effort or match our level of commitment, leaving us feeling drained and unfulfilled. We believe that if we stick around and continue to pour more into him, he will eventually turn around and see how amazing we are. But unfortunately, that's not always the case. Time waits for no man, and it's time for us to stop wasting it on someone who isn't worth it. He wasted your love, your money, and your energy, while you hoped that he would turn into someone worthy of your time. You must accept that if he hasn't gotten it together by now, he won't get it together any time soon. It's tempting to keep wa...

I remember being cheated on. I remember catching him red handed and listening as he denied the whole thing. I remember wondering if the other woman knew he was married. Odds are, she probably did. I didn't understand it and the truth is, I didn't need to. I just needed to remove myself from the situation. My ex was careless in his cheating. After my experience I began watching how men & women cheat. Cousins, friends, co-workers - it seems that everyone has a "Sneaky Link" or a "Secret Bae." And although the memes would have you thinking otherwise, it's not cute. But still, it's interesting. So here are some of the best tips I've learned on how to cheat without getting caught:  1. Let the person you are cheating with know that you are already married, or in a relationship. Have this conversation with the person from the beginning so they know their role, and so that you can establish boundaries. Be clear that you will not be leaving your spou...