Authentically Nita

I find self-reflection to be an important part of my healing journey.  It helps me become more aware of my accomplishments and my growth.  The end of the year is a great time for reflecting.  I have eight end-of-year reflection questions that I use.  These questions help me analyze myself, my experiences, my perception, my interactions and my actions.  This inturn helps me realize all the good that has happened over the past year.  It helps me realize my growth and gives me a sense of improvement.  At the same time, it lets me know where I need to improve.  Here are the eight questions I use for end-to-year reflection:  1. How did I take care of my body, mind, and soul? 2. What am I most grateful for? 3. What was my greatest challenge? 4. What did I have to accept? 5. What did I let go of that didn't serve me? 6. Who do I need to thank for their role in my life? 7. How did I break out of my comfort zone? 8. What am I most proud of? What are s...

Higher Purpose is not a wish list Higher Purpose is not fantasy playing Higher Purpose is not created by others; it begins with you. When someone is living in their Higher Purpose it transitions their whole way of BEING. We are fully alive and inspired. We do not just feel satisfaction, we feel fulfilled, filled with possibilities, humbled and peaceful beyond imagination. When we are not living our Higher Purpose we tend to feel unsure of ourselves, hesitant with our choices and inner duality. We possibly flounder or spend lots of time and energy on our results or forced outcomes for validation of how we feel rather than really enjoying the living and fullness that life has to offer. Knowing your Higher Purpose is not about results or "doing"- those are by-products of Higher Purpose Living. Higher Purpose is about the whom we were born to be. The first step to move into Higher Purpose Living is identification. Here is a worksheet designed to help you begin to understand yours...

Photo by Bekka Mongeau In the movie Dead Poets Society, Robin Williams urges his students to 'Carpe Diem' or 'Seize the Day'. In other words, wake up, pay attention to the now; don't spend one more minute living in auto control. I would like to fine tune that sentiment and change it to 'Direct your Day'. Seizing suggests grabbing hold of it, grasping, snatching and clutching the day. A lot of action but where is it heading? Directing suggests navigation, plotting your course so that you are moving in the direction of your outcomes or goals. Every day upon waking simply set an intention or a series of intentions for the day. 1. Today let me watch for the lessons that are presented me. 2. Today let me be there for someone who needs me. 3. Today let me practice self love 4. Today let me move steadily towards my outcome of ____________ I spent a week recently where it seemed that those nearest and dearest to me did nothing but whine about their jobs. I listened ...

A Personal Question:  What are you thinking - right now?  "I'm reading your article!" you say.  Well, take a little bit of a closer look. What's spinning in the back of your mind? Is it that big deadline that's looming at the end of the week? Or how you're going to deal with your mother-in-law this weekend? Or maybe you're worrying about your finances? Are you even aware of the thoughts going through your head right now?  What about... now? Some Bad News From the Thought Police Scientists estimate that an average person will think at a rate of roughly between 1 and 4 thoughts per second while awake. That's well over 60,000 thoughts during a typical day! And, of all this jabbering going on in your head, it's estimated that you've thought over 95% of your thoughts before. So, not only is your mind generally on a constant hamster wheel, but it's also doing this spinning continuously, unproductively - and unoriginally. The Power Between Your Ea...

Photo by Rahul Pandit Where's the magic? When was the last time you got up in the morning brimming with excitement, unable to keep still because of all the exuberant possibilities that the day ahead was holding for you? All those fun adventures, mischievous plans, playful projects... Kids will often experience this kind of unbearable excitement for the day ahead - for life itself. They have not yet taken on so many beliefs about life that many of us, adults, have accumulated over the years. What are your beliefs, the messages playing in your head? Tune in, look at what's there. Is it something like: life is hard; you don't get anything for free; you work hard and then you die; it's always a struggle; you have to pay your dues; you have to take things seriously; life isn't fair; my life stinks; I never get a break...? You've probably had these, or other variations of such thoughts spinning through your mind at various points - either consciously or not. And what...

Photo by: Ketut Subiyanto What makes two people compatible? Is it mutual physical attraction? Is it sex? Is it that you like the same things, like  pizza and basketball? Dictionary.com defines, 'compatibility' as the natural ability to live or work together in harmony because of well-matched characteristics." And according to Scott Petullo of Mystic Twins, "innate compatibility isn’t something you make, but something two people naturally possess." This would mean that true compatibility isn't something you can choose, and it isn't a matter of a couple working hard to make their differences bearable. Instead, true compatibility occurs naturally and you either have it, or you don't. So, how do you know if you're compatible with someone? Below is a list of six factors that exist when you and your partner are compatible. 1. You're physically attracted to each other - Physical attraction is what typically starts the connection between two people. ...

No one feels good about a debt collector breathing down their necks, but it happens. If you are lagging behind on your bills, it should not be surprising when you hear from a collection agency. If you do get a call from any such agency, it is better to get them off of your back as soon as possible. But in the meantime, while they are dialing you up every other day, there are likely some important facts they haven't told you. This article will disclose some of these undisclosed facts that everybody dealing with a business collection agency should know. The following facts have been provided Claire Johnson, a personal finance lawyer: You are not obligated to communicate with a collection agency :  A business collection agency does not have the right to harass you with their collection calls. However, it is advised not to ignore the initial calls, or any summons from the court. If you report a dispute, regarding the debt or a part of it, within 30 days of...

What to do when you're feeling confused. Photo by Felipe Cespedes Love is not a decision. Love is a feeling. The feeling is either there, or it isn't. You know from the beginning, because you feel it from the beginning. You also know if the feeling is mutual. However, what we do sometimes, is ignore the signs that tell us that despite how we feel about him, he doesn't feel the same way. We then kind of waste our own time believing that there is something there, that simply isn't. The truth is, if he loved you, you would know. There would be no confusion, and no doubt. If you find yourself in a situation where you are doubting where it's going and you're not sure if he's feels the same way about you, I recommend asking him directly, "Where is this going? Do you see us working out long term?" If he is unsure, or does not give you a direct answer, then you know what it is. You need to walk away from that situation. Before I get into why, I want to ...

Photo by Yan Krukov   Cash Advance apps offer people the ability to borrow small amounts of money in the form of cash advances. Some may have additional features, such as credit-building, saving and budgeting tools, and bank accounts. Most require a monthly membership fee and/or service fees that will be deducted from your account at the same time as your advance repayment. You will need to have a bank account with direct deposit from your employer in order to use these apps. Here is a list of nine, no hassle, Cash Advance apps you can use to get from pay check to pay check. Before I list them, I want to advise against using these apps unless it is an emergency. These should only be used every once in a while. If you are having problems getting from paycheck to paycheck, there is likely a bigger issue at hand. I recommend going over your income and expenses and watching your spending, or getting a second job. Click here for the budgeting app that I use and ho...

A few months ago, I posted a question on Facebook and Instagram, What do men want? Let's take a look at the answers I received: Traditional answers: The first two responses that I received are listed below. I've heard this from a lot of men over the years, so I don't think it's anything new or surprising. These men want to lead their family and they want a woman who allows them to do that. If you ask Google, 'Should a man lead the relationship?' it will tell you, "a man's role in a relationship is to lead." Then it will list a bunch of articles about why men should lead the relationship and why you should let them. I guess it's only natural that men want to lead because society teaches us that this is the way a relationship is run. I'm not saying it's wrong, I'm just making the point that men want to lead because that's what they've been taught. Likewise, many women prefer that the man leads the relationship be...

Dating should be exciting and fun, but for many of us it can be a little stressful. When you first start dating, you are not quite sure what the other person's expectations are. You don't know what your date will think of you when they meet you in person. You may even be a little anxious or nervous. But don't let that deter you from dating. Dating can be an exciting and rewarding stage in your life, and if you have patience, it may lead to finding someone who's just right for you.  Here are some helpful tips that may improve your dating experience:  1. Be sensible - The first two things you should do before you start dating are to evaluate your attitude and be realistic. It is important that you be realistic about what you desire and don't expect too much from a first date. You should avoid making assumptions because it could lead to disappointment. The only expectations you should have when going on a first date are that the date will go well, and that it will ...

Are you confused about his intentions? How do you know if he's filling time with you or taking you seriously?  There are a number of signs that will let you know if he plans to take things further, or if he's not. Here are 10 signs to give you a hint:  1. He's inconsistent - If he's not seeing you regularly or there is limited conversation, then he's not really interested in you. Inconsistency with his dates or attention shows a lack of interest.  2. He doesn't like labels - This is want guys tell you when they don't want you to be there girlfriend. Trust me, when he finds the one he wants, he will put a label on it. 3. He hasn't discussed exclusivity - If he hasn't ever brought up monogomy he's not into you. I man who is into you, is not going to want to share you and he'll discuss being exclusive.  4. He told you he doesn't want anything serious - He means with you.  5. He doesn't laugh at your jokes - Someone who is into you usual...

“The Lost Superfoods” contains all the forgotten survival foods and storage hacks that saved countless lives throughout human history. Click here to add them to your own pantry These are the real foods you should add to your pantry instead of “plastic” and expensive ones. Discover the Lost Superfoods that could save your life during the next crisis Like the “Doomsday Ration,” our own U.S government secretly developed to make sure we won the Cold War. Or the superfood that fueled the greatest Mongol conquests of Genghis Khan. This massive 271-page book is choke-full of inexpensive and long-lasting survival foods and preservation methods you won’t read or hear about anywhere else. Over 100 to be more exact. You’ll get all the recipes in minute detail with photos guiding you each step of the way. With these lost superfoods in your pantry, you’ll be able to keep your family well-fed during the darkest of times. Click here to find out the 100 Superfoods that we’ve lost to history

Years ago, before I was ever married, I remember asking a friend about trust. She was already married and had been with her husband for a few years. I asked her, "How do you know you can trust him? How do you have faith in him to do the right thing? Don't you ever worry he'll cheat on you?" She told me that you don't put your faith in your husband. You have faith in God. If your husband is doing something wrong, you trust in God to make it right. That conversation has always stuck with me. The bible says, "Trust in the Lord with all your heart, and do not rely on your own understanding; think about Him in all your ways, and He will guide you on the right paths." (NKV Proverbs 3:5-6). I took her words, my Bible, and six weeks of marital counseling with our pastor into my marriage. Still, after only three months, my husband was having an affair. I felt sick. I felt stupid. I felt betrayed. I was angry, and everything they told me went null and void. When y...

We live in a society where finding the "perfect" romantic partner is highly valued. From social media to movies to television we are bombarded with messages about what love should look like, what we should expect from our relationships, and what it implies if our relationship does not meet those standards. Reality looks different from those love stories that we see and hear all around us. However, most people still go into a relationship with a preconceived idea about how they’ll be treated. Usually our expectations are positive and hopeful. But social media specifically, can contribute to unhealthy comparison and unrealistic expectations for what a relationship is supposed to be like. Your relationship won't meet your expectations if your expectations are unrealistic.   In most relationships we expect honesty, trust, affection, loyalty, kindness, and respect. These are realistic expectations and the foundation of a healthy relationship. Having standards isn't wrong. ...

Cheating is a self-serving act. No one benefits from cheating except the cheater, and maybe the person they are cheating with. It doesn't matter what the underlying reason is that leads to the act of cheating, ultimately, people cheat because they are selfish. I say this because cheating is a choice, and the cheater chooses to cheat rather than find another way to deal with their issues. Scientific America published an article titled, Why Do People in Relationships Cheat? The article looks at a completed study on why people decide to cheat. 495 people were recruited and participated in the study. An analysis of the study revealed eight key reasons that lead to cheating: anger, self-esteem, lack of love, low commitment, need for variety, neglect, sexual desire, and situation or circumstance. These "reasons" or feelings are not uncommon in relationships and most people have, or will experience them. I look at the reasons listed in this study as the motivation behind the che...