Stop Dating Needy Men. You're not the Goodwill

Ladies, it's time to stop dating needy men. You know the ones I'm talking about, the guys who seem to only take from the relationship and never give back. The ones who drain your energy, demand your attention and always need you to do something for them. If you're tired of being the Goodwill of your relationships and donating your vagina to men who don't deserve it, then this post is for you.

First, let me clarify what I mean by “needy men.” These are men who are incapable of doing anything for themselves and believe that the world owes them something. They are the ones who always need you to babysit them emotionally or financially. When you’re dating a needy man, you are the one doing all the heavy lifting in the relationship. You're paying for the majority of expenses, driving them around, and picking up their messes.

Let me emphasize the importance of reciprocity in relationships. Relationships should be about give and take. When you're doing everything for someone, and they're not doing anything for you, it's time to call it quits. You shouldn't have to give up your time, energy, and resources to someone who can't/won't lift a finger to enhance your life. Or, for someone who is not doing enough. In a healthy relationship, both partners should be contributing equally.

When you’re in a healthy relationship, both partners should be upgrading each other’s lives. Upgrades could be anything that adds value to your life, including emotional support, physical intimacy, intellectual stimulation, and financial stability. When you’re dating a needy man, upgrades go out the window. All your time is spent trying to make him feel better, and you never get anything in return. Your life stays the same, or even worse, it gets worse.

If you're over the age of 40, you need to be extra vigilant about the men you're dating. You don't have time to waste on men who can’t contribute to your life. It's not about being picky. It's about being realistic and knowing what you want and what you deserve. As you get older, your priorities shift, and so should your dating preferences. You should be looking for a partner who can enhance your life, not drag it down.

It's time to stop dating needy men. You're not the Goodwill, and you don't owe anyone your time, energy, and resources. In healthy relationships, both partners should be contributing equally and upgrading each other's lives. Remember that your time is precious, and you don't have to settle for less just because you're single. Be patient, and the right partner will come along who can give as much as you do. Let's stop donating our value to the less fortunate and focus on finding a partner who can add value to our lives.

Photo by Nicola Barts

Comments

19 Affirmations for Responding to Rude People with Calmness and Compassion

We have all encountered rude people in our lives who don't realize how their behavior can overstep boundaries and cause others to feel disrespected. It can be tempting to use their behavior as an excuse to act rudely yourself in return, but doing so only perpetuates negativity. The key to becoming a class act is to respond to their behavior with calmness and compassion. Today, I am going to discuss how affirmations can help you achieve this goal. I have compiled a list of 19 affirmations that can help you respond to rude people in a positive way and improve your interactions. So, let's dive in! Photo by Madvortex 1) "I am patient and understanding" - When someone is being rude, it is easy to let our emotions take over. Instead, take a breath and remind yourself that others' actions often reflect something deeper going on in their lives. 2) "I like being polite" - Being polite may seem like an outdated courtesy in our fast-paced world, but it can make a w...

Ex ...(P2.1) The beginning

I think ...for you to truly understand, I have to go back to the beginning. I love, being in love, and back in my 20s it was I could dream about. I wanted a husband and a friend. I wanted a soul mate and a lover. I wanted a family. I wanted to grow old with my husband. I dreamed that one day we would be elderly sitting on our porch in rocking chairs fussing at our grandchildren together. My husband and I. Summer Fling 2002 - I was sitting in the kitchen listening to music when my mother called. She was at work and needed tampons. I grabbed the tampons and my purse and headed out the door. It was a warm summer night. I walked to the corner and checked for the bus. Nothing. I'd have to walk the four blocks to her job. It was Friday and the whole neighborhood seemed to be outside. Teenagers roamed the streets in groups talking loudly. Cars cruised down the block with various genres of music fading away as they passed. A small crowd lingered outside the Chinese store. I walked q...

Managing Money: Use Different Accounts for Different Purposes

Money management is key to building and maintaining wealth. And as women, it's important that we pay close attention to our finances and invest them wisely. One of the best financial tips that I've learned in my personal journey is to use different accounts for different purposes. By using this simple yet effective method, you can easily manage your money and reach your financial goals faster. How to set up different accounts: The first step is to determine which areas of your life require financial planning. This may include a retirement account, an emergency fund, a vacation fund, and so on. Then, open a separate account for each of these goals. Most banks offer free savings accounts, so take advantage of them. Once you have set up each account, determine the percentage of your income that should be allotted to each account. The benefits of using different accounts: By using different accounts, you can easily track your spending and savings. Each account is designed for a spe...

Ex... (P1.3)

I knew it. All the signs were there. This man flipped the script so fast! We were just in love and planning on starting our business so we could really build something. Ex had enrolled in school and began classes. Soon after, he started going out without me. He was staying out really late. At family events he sat in a corner with his face in his phone texting and smiling instead of talking with the guys. I wasn't stupid. I confronted him and he denied any wrong doing. I waited up for him so many nights. The bars closed at 2:00 am. Sometimes he didn't make it home until 5 or 6. He said he was at the "after hour." I called him a liar. I argued with him every day. I bitched and yelled, and he wouldn't tell me the truth. I tried talking and reasoning with him, but he wouldn't tell me the truth. I had to find out on my own. So I did. After only three months...

Unlocking the Confidence Within

In today's modern world, women are rising to the forefront. However, many of us have hidden our precious qualities beneath external influences. It's time to reclaim our self-confidence and unleash our true potential. A self-confident person knows what they need to be happy and fearlessly pursues it. We are all born with the inherent belief that we can conquer the world, but as we navigate life, external pressures can erode our self-assurance. Whether it's the harsh realities we face or the expectations placed upon us, the impact is profound. To rediscover our true selves and regain our self-confidence, we must let go of external influences. Here are some practical tips to guide you on this empowering journey: 1. Embrace your "flaws" as strengths. Often, what we perceive as imperfections are invisible to others. Rather than hiding what you desperately want to hide, embrace your uniqueness and find liberation. 2. It's impossible to please everyone , and trying ...

Impact, Influence and Inspiration

Leadership is not just about a title or a designation, it's about much more than that. It's about the impact you make, the influence you have, and the inspiration you bring to your team. Sometimes it can be challenging to step up and embrace the role of a leader. However, it's crucial to understand that leadership comes naturally when you immerse yourself in the vision of what you want to achieve and the changes you want to have in your team or organization. Impact, influence, and inspiration play a big role. Photo by Andrea Piacquadio Impact: Impact involves getting results that matter, not just for yourself but also for your team and organization. This means understanding the vision, driving the right outcomes, and being willing to assess shortcomings and seek feedback. To achieve impact, you must be able to not just set goals, but also create a plan with measurable actions and milestones. Celebrating success and learning from failures will help you build on what has be...

Embrace the Flow of Life and Unleash your Authenticity

Life can get a bit overwhelming as we get caught up in the frenzy of our daily responsibilities and obligations. From to-do lists to penciling in time, we try and control every aspect of our lives leaving little room for spontaneity. But what if we were to let go and allow things to flow naturally? What if by surrendering control and allowing ourselves to just be, we could experience a more genuine and fulfilling way of living. When we let things flow we open ourselves up to new possibilities, even if they deviate from our original plans. We let things happen in the moment without the constraints of how it should have happened, how it could have happened, or why it didn't happen. We stop conforming to societal expectations and worrying about how people are us. We live in the now and we show up as we are. You may be wondering how you could do such a thing. You may feel like you have too many responsibilities. Too many people too not let down. An image to keep up. But by embracing a...

Make Financial Honesty a Priority in Relationships

When it comes to relationships, there are certain topics that are often avoided, such as politics, religion, or even money. However, the latter is a crucial aspect in any partnership that can greatly influence the dynamics and longevity of the relationship. In particular, women tend to keep financial secrets from their partners early on, which can lead to misunderstandings, mistrust, and debt. As Manisha Thakor, a financial expert and co-author of “On My Own Two Feet,” advises, it’s important to be financially naked with your partner and have open and honest conversations about money. In this blog post, we’ll explore why financial honesty is crucial for relationships and how couples can improve their communication and management of finances. Photo by Mikhail Nilov The first reason why financial honesty is critical in relationships is that it sets the foundation for trust. If one partner conceals their debt or overspending habits, it can lead to a power dynamic where they hold the...

Authentically Nita

Search This Blog